Just gonna stand there and watch me burn. But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts. Just gonna stand there and hear me cry. But that’s alright because I love the way you lie.
Sometimes I seem to miss the way we use to be. The way we sat together in the hallway talking about our lives and how our futures would be. Do you remember when you and I said we would know each other forever? When you told me you loved me so much? It seems the people who were once so close to you, leave and hurt you the most. I can’t stand not talking to you everyday. The way when you smiled it made me happier. When I never had to talk for you to know exactly what was going on. Then that “party” happened to us. Which I ever regret letting happen. If I could go back, I’d do it in a heart beat. This is the one thing that’s going to hurt me the rest of my life. No one knows how truly hurt I am right now over this. I shouldn’t be. I promised myself I was over all of this, that I was over you. But to be honest, I love you as much as I did yesterday. And it will probably be the same tomorrow. I don’t want you in the way everyone would think I do. I want the friendship. I want to have eight hour conversations on the phone about nothing again. Falling asleep only to still being on the phone because you didn’t want to leave. Fighting over the most stupid things and forgiving each other immediately. The time I spent getting close to you, wasn’t a mistake. And it wasn’t meant to be let go so easily. Can’t you tell how much it hurts? Or is it just not that obvious. You make me want to cry every time I think how we use to be. How we still could be. Writing this is probably the hardest thing to do. All I can do is wait and see whats going to happen. All I can do is hope it will some how be like it use to. If not, I’ll have to figure out a way to pick the pieces up and move on.